The cat is out of the bag…Today is my birthday. Even though New Years was twelve days ago, I’ve personally made another full trip around the sun. I’m 43, but honestly, that’s a number that doesn’t mean very much to me. I feel so good that I actually woke up this morning and forgot for a moment it was my birthday. But I’m blessed to have family and friends who have reminded me with text messages and online posts. I know how lucky I am to have these people in my life.
I guess today is a good day for reflection. As I look back at my life I think, yeah, there’s a few things I’d do different. A few people I could have treated better. A few people I would have removed from my life earlier. A few people I would have held onto longer. A few chances I would have taken that I didn’t. Though, I love my life now, and would I have been the same person today had I made those choices?
Of course, that answer can never be discovered, and one thing I had learned in my years on this rock is that it’s not worth the emotional currency to think about it, let alone worry about it. I firmly believe we only have so much emotional currency to spend…It’s best not to waste it on the trivial.
Time is a road that moves forward, and it’s best to keep my eye on the road. With that, I’m conscious to be more understanding of the decisions I did or didn’t make in the past, and not make the same mistakes I did. I guess this is the older, wiser me.
Part of this new, Zen/Jedi mindfulness (I do have the beard, after all) is knowing that it is never too late to start something new. In fact, I encourage it. I’m actively seeking out opportunity to become a noob at something. To feel that rush of learning. The uncertainty or worry of doing something right or doing it well, and hopefully the accomplishment of mastering a new skill. If only a little.
I will continue to pursue those opportunities. That is my gift to myself in my forty third year. As for gifts from others? As I close my eyes before this imaginary candle on this imaginary cake, and make a wish I dearly hope comes true, I wish…
Health for my wife and for my daughters. That they live a long life full of laughter.
Strength to continue to see the good in a world that tries desperately to show the bad.
The courage to share my experiences, good and bad, in hopes that if I can reach just one person who understands and identifies, that they will know they are not alone.
The wisdom to learn from my mistakes and accept failure as a positive road to success.
The ability to forge ahead, even when I want to quit.
Many, many days spent with Mother Nature.
A Cubs World Series Championship before I’m too senile to realize it happened…
Happy Birthday to me!!!